You Complete Me
by True Roswellian
Summary: A princess and a slave. Susannah Simon and Jesse de Silva. Could their love spell disaster or happily ever after?
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** Hello everybody! This is our first story, yes our. Me and my co-author xodefygravityox, have been working on this one for a while. We really hope you guys like it, but give us a little slack if some of the stuff wouldn't be consistent with the 19th century, we didn't really know what French customs were back then, seeing how we didn't live back then…lol. Anyways, if you like, please review, it will let us know to continue or not 

**Disclaimer:** We own nothing but our plot. If we owned Mediator you'd be watching a TV series every Monday on some channel, or be watching the Trilogy of the books, oh, and there would be many many more books, Hehe

Chapter 1

Jesse's POV

The day I was brought to Princess Susannah of Aquitaine was the day my life began. I, being a lowly slave boy from Spain, serving various royalty throughout the world and her...a goddess. The most beautiful woman I have ever seen.

I guess it would be stretching it a bit to say I'm a boy, I mean, my 16th birthday just passed, so I'm old enough to be considered a man, but my heart is still that of a child; pure, hopeful, and there is the fact that I have never been loved by another, besides my Mama.

I speak nearly all Spanish, except for three words. As you wish. But when I speak them to Princess Susannah...it really means I love you.

Shall I start at the beginning of this tale, though? I'm sure you're all confused as to how I was brought here, how I even met the Princess.

It all began the day I was brought to her palace in France...

Susannah's POV

I sit in front of my mirror as my lady in waiting, Michelle, brushes my hair over and over again. I have to look "nice". Nice for a slave.

"Are you ready, your Highness?" Michelle asks me and I sigh, standing. "I guess," I reply. They're giving me a slave from Spain. Let me ask you, what do I need with a slave? I' perfectly capable of getting things myself.

Sometimes, though, when I'm having the cramps, or when I'm too lazy to do anything, a slave sounds nice though. I mean, I have more than enough servants, but they come and go, the slave boy will be there for my specific purposes.

I guess it is wrong...I mean, he isn't getting paid for all of this but I guess that's not my problem.

I grab my fan and walk out to the throne room, a throng of my ladies in waiting following me. I stop in front of the secret entrance and a squire opens it for me before I go to sit next to my mother, sitting as straight as possible so that I will actually be able to breathe.

"Good afternoon, Susie," my mother says to me and I smile, feeling unable to breathe. I hate corsets. No, hate isn't strong enough...I loathe them.

"Fine, mother, I just can't wait for this, and supper to be over, so I can take this blasted thing off and be able to breathe," I say, holding my stomach.

"It isn't that bad, Susie," she says to me, about to continue but at that moment, three men walk in. Well, two men walk...they're dragging the other one.

I perk up in my seat a little, craning my neck until my mother pushes me back, frowning, "It's not proper, Susannah, to crane your neck so," she hisses.

I hate that word...proper. Everything has to be proper around here. I roll my eyes at my mother (which so isn't proper...but who cares?), letting out a soft gasp as they literally throw the boy at my feet.

Andy, well King Andrew, my mother's second husband, after my father died from a heart attack when I was 6, clears his throat and starts talking to the man who brought in the boy...man, whatever.

My eyes, however, are on the boy. Well, ok, he isn't a boy...he's gotta be at least 16. His eyes flicker up toward me before he is told to keep his gaze to the floor.

I catch my breath, my grip tightening on my throne a little as those eyes looked up at me, and I noticed he blushed soon after.

They tell me that he will be mine, specifically here to do my bidding. But all I can think of are his big, brown eyes and how captivating they were, even if I only saw them for a second.

Finally he is dismissed by Andy and I let out a sigh, standing up and making my way back to my quarters to freshen up for supper, which is always a big event in the palace.

I stop suddenly, realizing I do not know his name. "Andy, what's his name?" I ask him.

Everyone in the room freezes as my voice rings our through the vast hall, I swear you could hear a pin drop.

I have no sooner done my hair into a braid and pinned it to my head, than the slave's master, that is the one that keeps them in check, knocks on my door and it opens a moment later.

"Your highness," he says, bowing to me. I notice he's brought Jesse with him who's been clothed in a white billowy shirt and tight black pants. Yum. Hey, don't look at me like that, only a blind person wouldn't be able to tell how undeniably hot my slave is.

"Claude," I reply, nodding my head. He pushes Jesse forward before bowing 2 or 3 more times and closing the door.

"Hello, Jesse," I say, smiling lightly at him. He looks up at me and nods as I sigh. Doesn't he speak English?

"Parlez-vous Français, si pas Anglais?" I ask him in French, wondering if maybe he just didn't speak English.

He says something to me in Spanish and I let out a groan of frustration. They give me someone who can't even understand me?

I frown and tap my chin with my finger, "Can you at least understand English, ou Français?" I ask.

"Si...English," he says, smiling a little. I smile and nod. "Good, I'm glad," I say, sitting down and sighing.

"Silly me...why am I sitting down? Supper is going to start any moment and several Vicomte's are attending tonight, Andy will be very sour if I'm late and 'disgrace them all'," I say, realizing that I was partially talking to myself.

"I don't know why he brought you here...I should be getting to dinner," I say to Jesse, giving him an apologetic smile before heading towards the door.

As he doesn't move I turn around, frowning, "Oh...uhm...I guess you could make my bed? Uhm...maybe replace the candles, they're getting low, and...well that's all I can think of," I tell him.

"As you wish," he says before doing what I ask. I sigh softly before hurrying down to dinner.

"I could only wish to have hair as soft as your, Princess," Marie, another of my ladies in waiting, says to me later that night as she combs and French braids my hair for bed.

"Thank you, Marie," I reply, standing up as she finishes.

She stands up and bows. "Good night, your Highness," she says.

"Good night," I say in reply, smiling and waiting for her to leave before wrapping my night robe around me and slipping my feet in my slippers, walking over to the window and opening it, leaning out a bit and sighing wistfully.

The palace garden is so beautiful, especially at night. It's one of my favorite places in the world. Not that I have much to compare it to.

I can only go out there once or twice a week, though. During the day I am too busy with my lessons to go outside. I only get to you out there when I have a few minutes of free time on Sunday after mass.

As I gaze down at the garden, my mind drifts to Jesse. He had done everything I asked him to, and more. He left a single orchid on my bed which was freshly made. How could he have known that orchids are my favorite?

...Well maybe it wasn't too hard to guess. I had portraits of them hung all over my walls, and one of the blankets that was strewn across my bed had an orchid stitched into it, but still!  
And the way he said "As you wish"...it...I don't know, made my heart flutter in my chest.  
I knew it was wrong to be feeling these things...I am only 14, and aside from that fact, he was a slave. He was the lowest of low on the society ranking scale.  
That's what I hate about being a princess. My life is not in my hands. I can't dress how I want; act how I want...love who I want. And that's what hurts most of all.  
A lone tears silently slips out of my eye, betraying my emotions, and I quickly wipe it away before bringing my hand to my mouth as I break down, not able to wipe away all of the tears flooding down my cheeks now.  
Why am I crying, you ask? Well, tonight at dinner, my mother told me that she had a husband picked out for me. That SHE picked who I am going to marry.  
Well, probably not only her. I'm sure Andy was all too willing to help her pick someone. A sob escapes my mouth and I continue to wipe at my tears.

As I continue to cry, I feel a hand on my shoulder that scares me half to death. As I look into those big brown eyes, I just lose myself and fall into Jesse's arms.

He seems startled at first, reluctant to touch this blubbering girl who has thrown herself at him, one that could cost him his life if he was caught touching.

But after a moment he wraps his arms around me as I continue to cry. In this moment, I feel more comfort than I ever have in my life.

I hear him mumbling things in my ear, but I can't understand a word he's saying...it's all in Spanish.

After a while, my tears run dry and I look up at him. "I'm sorry you had to see me like this," I say softly.

He shakes his head, taking my face in his hands and wiping away my remaining tears a confused look on his face as if he was struggling with something internally.

As he rests his hand against my cheek, I know what is going to happen. And I'm not afraid. His comforting eyes gazing into mine wipe all of my fear away.

My heart starts to beat even faster as Jesse leans in closer and closer, his eyes darting from my eyes down to my lips.

The space between us is closed when I feel his soft lips against mine. It feels so wonderful, to be kissed by him.

But yet again...this is my first kiss, so I don't know if this is considered a good kiss or a bad one...but from the way my heart flutters and my stomach does thing weird clenchy thingie...I'm thinking it's good.

I don't want this feeling to end, this feeling of completeness. Is it possible to love a man after just one day?

I lean my head just a tad bit to the side so I can fuse my lips with his more completely, but just then he pulls abruptly back, a look in his eyes that I had never seen before, but it is quickly replaced with fear as he quickly starts rambling in Spanish.

I know he is voicing what I am thinking: It cannot be. I am a princess, he is a slave. It's like we're in two different worlds.

I know he thinks he isn't good enough for me, he's merely a slave but right now I don't care that I'm a princess...I don't care that he isn't some form of nobility, I just want that feeling back, that feeling that someone actually cares about me.

"Jesse," I whisper, reaching forward for his hands. I want to touch him, be near him. He promptly backs away, still rambling in Spanish.

The only thing I pick up is "Querida", and I have no clue what it means, but when he says it, it sounds more beautiful than any other word in any other language in the world.

My hands are still outstretched, my eyes begging him to hold them. He is silent before he does and right then and there, I know that I am lost. Gone. Done for. I have fallen in love.

It seems silly, I know, that someone my age could fall in love after only knowing this boy...man, for less than a day...but it has happened with me. I have fallen in love at first sight.

"Jesse, I..." I begin but he silences me, pressing a finger to my lips. Though we don't speak the same language, I know he understands and I know he feels the same.

He takes my hand in his and leads it to his lips, kissing my fingers softly before placing his hand over his heart, "Querida..." he whispers.

He pulls me into an embrace and just holds me like that. I never want to leave his arms. I want him to hold me forever, until the end of time.

I feel his heartbeat, constant and steady, against my ear and it slowly lulls me to sleep, my eyes drooping with every passing second that I was near Jesse.

I feel him carry me to my bed, placing me on top and giving me a soft, gentle kiss. Now I know what it feels like to be loved...and I never want it to stop.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:** We decided to post this a little early, thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed to this story, it means more than you think 

**Disclaimer:** All characters owned by Meg Cabot, we only own the plot

Chapter 2

6 weeks later

I quickly rush over to the loose floorboard next to the fireplace, crouching down and lifting it up after looking around to see if any of my ladies in waiting were lingering around. Today is my birthday and Jesse told me to look in here the second I woke up. Well...at least I think that's what he told me.

His English and French have gotten slightly better and in my spare time (what little I have, anyway) I've been trying to learn Spanish.

...But even so, his ability to speak to me in a language that I understand is still small, and he still points and uses his hands a lot when he talks to me.

But that doesn't matter. We both speak the language of love. Oh God, that sounded corny, but whatever. As I open the floorboard, I find a poorly wrapped parcel with an orchid on top.

I smile and reach for the orchid, smelling it before setting it aside and ripping off the brown paper, my heart swelling as I life up the small wooden pendant of a sparrow he must have carved out of a piece of wood.

It's probably the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I usually get these big grand presents that I don't even care about. Something small like this shows how much time he put into it by carving it himself.

It is strung onto a long black leather cord, probably a leftover corset lace or something, and even though it fits it perfectly I know I must find a silver chain for it, or I could never wear it, my mother would spot that black cord off the bat.

I smile and set the necklace down on my bedside table before calling for Jesse. He has a secret entrance to my room, specifically built so that he could get to me whenever I needed him.

I see the door open and he walks in, a secret smile on his face as he looks to the ground, his long lashes making his chocolate eyes even more beautiful.

I walk over to the door to make sure it's locked before hurrying over to him, hugging him tightly. "Thank you for my present, Jesse," I whisper in his ear.

"Anything for you, Querida," he says slowly and I smile at his attempt to speak English. "I can't wear it just yet, I have to find a silver chain for it...otherwise my mother would spot it instantly. I absolutely love it though, I can't tell you how much I love it...I really do...love it," I say, and for some reason I can't stop myself from saying that...love.

He laughs as I ramble. "But not as much as I love you," I whisper before kissing his lips.

"Querida...we can not...it is daylight out," he says quickly pulling back, though I can tell that is the last thing he wants to do right now.

I pout but nod, kissing him softly once more. "I have surprise, querida," he tells me and I grin.

"A surprise? What?" I ask him excitedly, bouncing up and down as I take his hands.

He laughs and shakes his head. "Tonight, querida...I will come for you," he tells me.

I pout once again, looking down to the floor. Tonight? Tonight is forever away. At least I will have tonight to look forward to, though, when I have to go to all of the things my family has prepared for me, a ball, a grand supper...the works.

"I can hardly wait, Jesse," I tell him, squeezing his hands.

"Good...I must go, Claude will be up soon," Jesse says, glancing around before swooping down and giving me a soul searing kiss.

I cling desperately to him, not wanting to let go, but I have to. As we part, I clasp his hand tightly, letting go slowly until only our fingertips touch.

"Te amo...mi querida," he whispers as he gets nearer to the door, placing his hand over his heart before slipping silently out of my room.

I sigh wistfully and fall back on to my bed, a goofy grin plastered on my face.

A few happy moments later a knock rings throughout my room, and my mother is walking in, completely dressed up, even though it is only early morning.

"Happy birthday, Susie!" she exclaims, and I sit up, still grinning.

"Thank you, mom," I reply.

"Now...why aren't you up yet? We have to get you bathed and dressed, and perfumed for tonight's festivities!" she exclaims, and I know there is only one reason she is treating me so nicely...the man she wants me to marry will be there.

I have been dreading this day for quite sometime. I don't WANT to marry someone else! I want to marry Jesse! But that could never, ever happen.

I catch her looking at something over my shoulder, and only too late do I realize my pendant is still out in the open, "Susannah...what is this? My, my it is spectacularly done, did you get it from the market when we went to Paris in May? (It is now late November).

I nod frantically, "Yes...I, erm, yes I did, I just haven't had the chance to get it a proper silver chain..." I say quickly.

"It truly is exquisite," she says, smiling. "We'll find a chain for you immediately."

I smile broadly, "Thank you so much mother," I say, beaming up at her and giving her a hug in a rare show of affection on my part.

She seems taken aback at this but hugs me back. "You're very welcome, Susannah," she says to me.

"Where is Françoise? She usually helps me with my baths," I say, looking around for my favorite lady in waiting.

"Why don't you ask Jesse to fetch her for you? You haven't been using him," she says and I cringe on the inside. She says "using him" like I OWN him or something.

"Uhm...well alright, then," I say and I clear my throat, about to call Jesse in when Francoise bustles into my room, apologizing for being tardy.

I'm about to tell her it's all right but my mother scolds her for her tardiness and I sigh. She's like this to all of our servants.

Françoise stands perfectly still as my mother berates her and warns her if we must send someone to fetch her ever again she will be without a job.

As my mother leaves, I quickly apologize to Françoise but she brushes it away, telling me that my mother was right which totally ticks me off.

I quickly undress and she helps me bathe before getting out my gown for tonight and lying it down atop my bed, quickly working at my hair.

I wish there was something that could make my hair silky and smooth...or instantly dry. I hate my hair after bathing.

Françoise has to go through this boring and long labor of towel drying my hair, which takes forever since my hair is halfway down my back, and after that she must help to put it up, but usually some of my other ladies help me with that.

After nearly two hours, I am ready and left alone for a moment. This is when Jesse visits me. "Jesse!" I squeal quietly, making sure no one is coming. "This is dangerous!"

"I had to see you," he says and he quickly looks me up and down before saying something in Spanish. I don't believe he's ever seen me as dressed up as I am right now but once or twice before.

"Querida...words cannot describe how beautiful you are," he tells me, smiling and taking my hand.

"Thank you," I say, smiling right back at him but bringing one hand up to my chest, where there is cleavage showing due to my new corset. I love Jesse, but I am still extremely modest around him.

He smiles, though his smile fades almost immediately. "Are you going to meet him tonight?" he asks and I nod sadly. He found out about my betrothed when he overheard my mother and I talking one night.

He doesn't say anything after that, just looks down to the ground, his long lashes making it impossible for me to see his eyes.

I reach out and tilt his chin up so he's looking at me. "I love you, you know that," I say softly.

"I know...I know Querida," he says softly and I lean in, pressing my lips to his.

He places his hand on my cheek and takes control of the kiss, his other hand on the small of my back, pulling me closer. His kisses are so wonderful...I like to lose myself in them. After it starts to get really heated, I push him away. "You must go," I whisper, our faces still close.

He sighs and nods, placing a sweet, loving kiss on my lips. "I will come for you...tonight," he tells me and I nod my head.

"Yes...now please, go quickly, before you are caught," I say softly and he does, just as there's a knock at my door. "Come in," I say, checking myself in the mirror one last time. Hey, even if I don't want to go to this ball, I should still look good.

My mother enters, smiling. "Oh Susannah, you look wonderful," she tells me and I turn to smile at her.

"Thank you, mother," I reply, turning back to the mirror before following her from the room. I just pray that this night goes quickly.

Supper goes by very fast, I am sitting besides Andy tonight in my mother's usual spot of honor, seeing how the celebration is on my behalf, and since I am so close to the king, I have no chance to socialize with the other guests...at least at supper I don't.

They introduce me to my future husband right away. His name is Paul Slater and I hated him from the moment I set eyes on him.

One, he's British, and the only reason they are even considering a British man is to settle some issues between Aquitaine and parts of Great Britain, and for two he just had that cocky arrogance, he was the type of man who assumed I would just fall head over heels in love with him from the moment I lay eyes on him since he happened to have been graced in the looks department.

And besides all that, he keeps looking at me like he's...undressing me with his eyes. Creepy.

The very first dance is given to me and my father, as is custom. Though I never call Andy my father, he is technically a father figure to me, and I respect him.

As we are dancing, he asks me what I think of Paul. I tell him he is a fine suitor, though I want to scream that I hate him and that I love Jesse.

"I want you to be happy, Susie, I want you to have the best man possible, and I believe Paul is that man," he says.

I smile and nod my head. "Thank you, Andy," I say as the song ends.

"I think it would be suitable if you gave Paul the next dance...get to know him," Andy says, smiling down and kissing my cheek.

I smile back and nod as Paul walks over to me. "May I have this dance?" he asks. I nod reluctantly and take his hand.

"So, Princess. I have a feeling we will be married before your 17th birthday," Paul says, smiling down at me as we start dancing to the song, which, blasted musicians, happens to be slower.

"Please, Paul, there's no need for that. Call me Suze," I tell him, letting my eyes looking anywhere but him.

"Suze...such a short name for such a magnificent woman," Paul says, smiling, and I can't help but blush a little.

"Well, my name is Susannah, but I prefer Suze," I tell him, glancing up at him and smiling a little.

"Susannah...yes, I think Suze fits you better," Paul says, smiling down at me with his striking baby blue eyes.

He pulls me a little closer and I look over my shoulder, gasping when I see Jesse watching us from a secret servant's area.

"What is it?" Paul asks me, his hand wrapped a little too intimately around my waist.

My eyes lock with Jesse's for a moment before I shake my head. "Nothing, Paul," I reply, looking away from Jesse.

Paul frowns a little but nods, reaching up to his collar and adjusting it briefly. I have to admit, Paul looks pretty impressive in his attire, which is much different from ours, the English being much more conservative.

"Let's go somewhere," he whispers in my ear as the song ends. I look back to where Jesse is. He's still watching us, his gaze fixed on Paul.

"I...I don't think that would be appropriate," I say to him a little nervously. I have no clue how old this guy is, but he's definitely not 15.

Apparently he doesn't hear me or is ignoring me because next thing I know, we're outside in the garden. I have to admit, I love it out here but I would rather be out here with Jesse.

"Paul...sir, how old are you?" I ask him, holding my hands down at my waist as I sit down.

"Eighteen," he tells me, reaching for my hand which I hastily move out of reach.

He sighs, shaking his head softly, "Nice corset, might I say, it defines your...figure quite well," Paul says, grinning as I gasp, moving my hands to cover myself.

"Come on, Suze, we'll be married soon," he says, moving closer and putting his arm around me.

"You're not being proper, Paul, I don't like it, and we haven't even set anything in stone yet, how do you know for sure?" I snap, scooting away.

"Do you not want do marry me?" he asks and I grimace. I bet he was quite the player back in Britain. Ugh.

"For one thing, I know absolutely nothing about you! And for another, you don't go up to a woman who you're thinking about trying to charm into marriage and compliment her corset!" I exclaim again, standing up and walking to the other side of the garden patio.

"We have plenty of time to get to know each other after the honeymoon," he says silkily, coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

I frown and pull his arms off of me, completely repulsed. Honeymoon? With him?

I'm going back inside now," I tell him, glaring up at him before turning to leave.

"Wait, I'm sorry Suze...I was ahead of myself. It's just hard not to be when I'm with such a beautiful woman," he says, reaching for my gloved hand.

I turn around and look at him, sighing. If I take his hand, I'll feel like I'm betraying Jesse.

"It's not proper for an unwed lady to be alone in the presence of a man unless he is her father, betrothed, or servant," I recite to him.

"Well, I am your betrothed," he says, taking a step closer to me.

"Not officially," I say, crossing my arms over my chest and suddenly feeling as if I'm naked.

"Well, you're as good as," he says angrily. I can tell he's getting frustrated.

"What do you want from me?" I ask, turning around to face him.

"I want you, Susie Q," he says, now grinning at me.

"Susie...what?" I ask him, frowning a bit.

laughs and is about to kiss me but I push him away, hard. So hard that I nearly knock him over. My lips are reserved for Jesse, thank you very much.

"You better watch that attitude of yours," he growls, glaring at me.

"What are you going to do about it?" I ask, glaring right back at him.

Another laugh resonates through the almost empty courtyard and a small shiver shoots down my spine, "Now, do you really have to ask me that?" he asks.

For some reason, my mind flies to Jesse. But no, he couldn't possibly know about that.

I raise an eyebrow at him and he scowls over at me, "Now I know why they say children should be seen, not heard," he says.

That's it. This guy is DONE. I slap him across the face. No one calls me a child and gets away with it.

He reaches up, still in shock, and touches the now slightly red spot before he realizes what happens and his cold eyes set on me.

But before he can say anything, I head back inside, wanting more than anything for this night to be over and to see Jesse.

"This isn't the end of this Susannah," he says mockingly but I simply stick my nose up even further in the air.

"Susannah, is everything all right?" my mother asks as I enter the ballroom.

"Yes, of course. Perfect," I snap, smoothing out my skirts before walking into the crowd and being immediately immersed in the people.


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed this story, your reviews mean so much to us 

Disclaimer: We don't own Mediator. Period.

**Chapter 3**

Two hours later, I was free...so to speak. Up in my room, I was changed into my night gown, waiting for Jesse.

At 10:00 he has still not shown up and I start to wonder if he isn't coming at all...maybe he doesn't love me as much as I love him...

At this thought, a tear slides down my cheek but at that moment, Jesse appears in my room, smiling brightly at me. "Querida," he whispers.

"Jesse! I thought you weren't coming!" I cry as loudly as I dare, running to him and throwing my arms around his neck as I bury my face in his chest.

He wraps his arms around me and whispers, "I will always come for you."

"I know but...god I hate Paul. He is such a...a...I don't know," I say, resting my cheek against him, hearing his heartbeat softly through the thing fabric of his shirt.

"Bastardo," Jesse mutters under his breath and I nod in agreement, letting a few tears fall from my eyes. "What did he do querida?"

"First he acted just...vulgar around me, making rude comments, and then he tried to kiss me, and he just...he already presumes that we're betrothed!" I cry, tearing myself away from Jesse's grip to walk over to my window.

He comes up beside me, placing his hand over mine. "I only wish I could take away your pain," he says softly.

"You said you had a surprise for me?" I ask him, my voice calmer now as I turn to him, the cold air from outside freshening my mood a little.

He grins and nods his head. "Si, querida, come with me," he says, taking my hand and leading me to the door where he entered.

"Where are we going?" I whisper in his ear, placing my hand on his broad shoulder as he reaches for a coat and wraps it around my shoulders.

"It's a surprise," he says, squeezing my hand and leading me outside.

"Jesse, I need to know!" I say, giggling and walking quickly to keep up with him, "Pleeeease?"

He laughs and says, "Patience, Susannah, we're almost there." I giggle a little more, though I stop when we reach our destination.

"Here it is," he says, his hand trailing down to mine and clasping it in his as I gape. I'm not kidding either, my mouth is wide open, it would have appalled my mother.

He's brought me to a small, secluded courtyard with lilies and orchids all over while the only light provided is that of the fireflies hidden in the trees and the stars and moon above us

"Oh my God...it's beautiful!" I exclaim, covering my mouth with my hands, "How did I not know about this place?"

"Not many know about it," he says, guiding me over to a bench where we sit. "Happy birthday, querida."

"Thank you so much, Jesse. It's been one of my best birthdays yet," I whisper to him before leaning in to kiss him.

We sit there kissing for quite some time before I hear footsteps. Jesse instantly pulls away from me and I know he heard it too.

"Nombre de Dios..." he mutters, his eyes wider.

"Jesse! What are you doing with the princess this late at night!" Claude demands and I start to panic.

"He just...I...he...I wanted to see the gardens more and..." I stutter, not able to think of anything to say.

"Jesse, you come with me," Claude says in a dangerous voice. Jesse looks over at me with frightened eyes before standing.

"Claude...he...I..." I say as Claude seizes Jesse by his shirt and drags him off, coming as close to yelling without waking up the entire palace, at Jesse as he does so.

"Claude, please!" I call after him but he obviously can't hear me and I am left alone, tears gathering in my eyes.

I roughly wipe them away before going back into the castle and running as quickly and quietly as I can back to my room, locking the door behind me once I'm in.

Around what I think is one in the morning, I hear the servant door open and see Jesse fall to the floor once he's inside.

"Mon Dieu!" I exclaim, quickly throwing back my sheets and rushing over to where he was, shutting the door snugly before looking down at Jesse, trying not to burst into tears.

"Jesse...what happened? What did he do to you?" I whisper frantically, helping him up.

The second he stands up, leaning on me for the most part, I can tell why and I let out a soft cry.

They whipped him on his perfect back. He has five slashes on his back. "God, Jesse, I am so sorry," I whisper, tears starting to fall from my eyes.

"Querida...don't cry," Jesse says, wincing in pain as I lift up his shirt.

"Jesse...I need you to take off your shirt so I can tend to your wounds," I say, trying not to cry, for him.

He lies face down across my lap as I tend to his wounds. I only wish that this didn't happen to him! It's all my fault.

He flinches slightly as I start to dress his wounds, putting on a cream that helps with the pain of the lashings and helps heal them cleanly, and this is when a tear slips out of my eye and lands on his skin.  
I finish a few moments later, tears now flowing from my eyes at full force. "Jesse, I'm so sorry," I whisper as he starts to sit up.  
He winces in pain as he moves but then he sees my face and it's as if he forgets about it altogether, "Querida...no, don't cry, it wasn't your fault, don't blame yourself," he says, cupping my tearstained face in his hands, cradling it gently.  
I swallow my tears and shake my head. "Yes...yes it is," I mumble, turning my head slightly and kissing his palm.  
"Querida...Susannah, I shouldn't have taken you there in the first place, it was dangerous and risky," Jesse says before trailing off in a string of Spanish words that I don't understand. I close my eyes and take a deep, shattered breath before instructing him to turn around so I can bandage up the wounds.  
He nods his head but before turning around, he kisses me softly. "I love you, querida...that's never going change," he whispers.  
I close my eyes and nod in understanding, and he slowly turns around as I find a gauze wrap for his back.  
He winces a little in pain as I wrap the gauze around him, but once I start to tear up, he assures me once more that it is NOT my fault. "I just wish I could take the pain away," I whisper.  
"You're al...already helping," he says as I finish off the bandage, tying it securely in place.  
He turns to face me with some difficulty and pulls me into his arms. I could lay forever like this.  
His fingers gently stroke my long hair, which I've left unbraided tonight on account of wanting to get my ladies in waiting out of the room as soon as I could, that way there would be less chance of Jesse getting caught.  
"I should go," he tells me. I don't want him to leave, I want him to stay forever, hold me forever.  
"Y...yeah, I guess..." I say softly, looking down at my sheets.  
He gently tilts my chin up so that I'm looking into his eyes. "Te amo, mi querida," he whispers, pressing his lips against my forehead.  
"I love you too," I say, sighing as he slowly stands up, picking up his shirt, which was ruined now.

"Jesse, wait," I call softly after him. He turns to look at me and I continue, "Stay with me. Please."

"It...it's not wise, Querida," he says, but he takes a few steps back towards me.

I pout a little but nod. Of course...he's right. "Of course...what was I thinking," I mumble.

He sighs softly, walking quickly over to where I sit and leaning down, kissing me, "I will see you in the morning..." he says softly.

I nod silently and kiss him passionately, bringing my hand up to his cheek. "I love you, Jesse...so, so much," I whisper.

"I love you too. Now get some rest," he says, helping me get into bed, kissing my forehead once more, before leaving the room silently.

"Susannah, wake up," I hear the next morning as someone gently shakes me awake.

I slowly open my eyes, smiling a little when I see my mother hovering over me, "Good morning mother," I say, sitting up.

"I received some interesting news from Claude last night," she tells me and I feel a knot form in my stomach.

"What type of news...?" I ask, pulling my covers back and sitting up.

"That you were out in the garden with Jesse last night," she replies.

"Do you always trust the servants, mother? I thought you said that they frequently lied," I say, pursing my lips.

"Which is why I'm coming to you. Is this true, Susannah?" she asks me.

"Would it matter if it were?" I ask her in return, biting my lower lip softly, "Jesse and I are friends."

"Princesses and slaves are not friends, Susannah, it's not proper," she says sternly and I let out a groan of frustration.

"I don't CARE if it isn't proper, mother! I'm not going to end my friendship with him because it isn't proper! I barely have any friends as it is, because you and Andy keep me inside this God awful palace all day, cooped up like a bird in a cage!" I exclaim.

"I will NOT be spoken to this way!" she exclaims, standing up.

"Fine! I don't want to speak to you! Get out of my room!" I cry out, standing up and running into my sitting room, which is next to my bedroom, and locking that door.

Surprisingly, she doesn't attempt to follow me and I'm left alone. Thank God.

A knock sounds on the door about half an hour later as I am reading and I walk over, cracking it open, "Oh...Marie," I say, stepping back into my room so she can help me dress.

"Good morning, your highness," she says, smiling as I enter the room.

"Good morning," I say, pulling off my nightgown and old undergarments as she collects fresh ones for the day. I will still have to wear a corset, but my dress will be much more casual than the one I wore last night.

"Thank you, Marie," I say to her and she bows to me before leaving.

Making sure she's really gone, I call for Jesse. A huge grin comes to my face as he appears in the room. "Good morning, querida," he says, smiling.

"Good morning," I say, rushing over and kissing him before clearing my throat, "Mother knows...about last night...I'm afraid I'm going to have to start making you do more things..."

"It's all right, querida," he says to me. I expected him to be smiling, but his face was devoid of any emotion. "Actually, I did a lot of thinking last night..." Oh God. No. Please, don't try and end this...end us.

"Susannah...this, it can't continue," Jesse says in a near whisper and I feel the tears coming to my eyes.

I start to speak but he cuts me off. "I have nothing to offer you, Susannah," he continues. "And you're betrothed to another. This has to stop."

"You don't really mean that, Jesse...you don't! You know I don't care about any of that!" I cry, trying to keep my voice down.

"Querida...I would give you the world if I could, but I cannot," he says softly. I shake my head furiously, letting a few tears fall from my eyes. "I don't want the world...I just want you," I tell him.

"I'm sorry. I've made up my mind," he says soberly.

"Jesse no! Please!" I exclaim brokenly, reaching for his hand.

"I'm sorry Querida...they're switching me, I now serve Jake," Jesse tells me.

I feel like my heart's been ripped from my chest. "Please tell me this is all a dream...and that when I wake up, you'll be here with me," I say softly, taking a few steps closer to him.

"I am sorry, but it's true. Goodbye Susannah," he says before backing away and leaving the room.

I drop to my knees and release my tears, placing my hand over my mouth as I sob.

Minutes later I hear the door Jesse walk out open, and Claude comes in with a girl, younger than I am possibly.

I hastily wipe my tears and look up, smiling through the tears gathered in my eyes. "Your highness," Claude says, bowing to me, as does the girl.

"This is Renee," he says, pushing her forward a little more, "I hope she will be of better service to you than Jesse was."

"Thank you, Claude," I say tonelessly. "Of course, your Highness," he says before leaving the room.


	4. Chapter 4

5 months later

"Renee? Could you fetch me some new candlesticks? These ones are nearly used up," I call to Renee as I finish my reading late at night.

"Of course, your highness," she says, quickly doing as I ask. The past five months have been...well, empty. My heart is empty without Jesse.

I see him now and then when I go to Jake's chambers for our weekly card game, but it's only for a moment or two at a time.

"Anything else tonight, Miss?" Renee asks and I shake my head. "No, that's all, thank you," I tell her, smiling.

I quickly finish the last pages of my book, sighing as I set it down next to me and stare up at my canopy until sleep starts to take over my body and I lean over, blowing out my candle.

I wake up the next morning to find my blanket pulled even tighter around me and my window shut. I let a small smile creep on to my face as I think of the person who fills my dreams: Jesse.

I let out a soft sigh and roll onto my side. He may not have been talking to me, or making eye contact with me lately, but every night for the past 4 months or so I have woken up with my window closed; I usually open it at night because I am warm, and the blankets up around my chin.

I just wish he could talk to me, look at me...hold me in his arms. I miss the feeling of completeness he gave me,

I miss feeling like someone actually loved me in this brick prison I live in. I mean, sure my mother loves me, but Jesse's love...it was different.

So during the day, I have my lessons and meetings and meals and such but at night, when I'm alone at night, all I can think about is Jesse.

One evening, after I had gone out horseback riding for the entire day with Paul, something I have my mother to blame, I come into my room and change into my sleeping gown, opening the window to cool off my warm room.

The whole time I was with Paul, I couldn't stop thinking of Jesse and I came up with an idea. I'm going to wait until Jesse comes to close the window, so that I can see him again. Hear him again...feel him touching me.

I smile a little bit as I look out across the gardens and I see the villiage surrounding the palace, feeling less stressed than I had in a while.

It's a few hours before I hear the servant's door opening and see Jesse standing before me. He seems surprised that I'm awake.

I sit up a little more in my bed, where I had been lying down, and smile up at him softly.

"Querida," he whispers and I let out a soft sigh. I had missed him calling me that.

"Jesse," I reply, looking into his dark eyes, the only light in my room being the light of the moon outside my window.

He slowly walks over to the bed, as if he's being drawn to it, to me. I crawl to the edge and he takes my face in his hand, standing beside the bed, looking down at me.

"I've missed you Jesse," I say softly, opening my mouth to say something else to him when he leans down and kisses me softly.

"You have no idea, querida," he mumbles against my lips before kissing me passionately, joining me on the bed.

"Why have you been ignoring me?" I ask him, frowning as he kneels on the bed in front of me.

"If they find us again...it will be bad for the both of us," he replies, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

I nod, knowing that what he was saying was true, "Especially for you," I whisper. The only thing they would end up doing with me was maybe make me go visit some relatives, in another town, away from Jesse...but him, he wouldn't get away that easily, not at all.

He nods in understanding and I let out a sigh. "Then why do you come here, every night, closing my window?" I ask.

Unless the moonlight is casting wrong shadows, I can swear I see a blush arise on his perfect face at my words.

I smile a little and reach my hand up to stroke his cheek. "I've been empty without you, Jesse," I whisper.

He sighs and leans into my caress, saying something softly in Spanish, which frustrates me slightly.

But my frustration is wiped away when he gently brushes his lips against mine in a sweet, simple kiss.

"I have been also, Querida. Why do you think everynight I come in here? I need to see you, and even though you're asleep, it still helps." he whispers.

"It is not enough to just see you," I tell him. "I need your lips, your touch, your eyes, your smile...I need you, Jesse."

At this his breathing starts to become faster and he swallows, slowly, still gazing at me, though I could tell his resistance was wavering.

"Hold me, Jesse," I say softly, my emerald eyes gazing into his deep brown ones.

Again, he mutters something in Spanish, and this time I frown, taking his jaw in my hand, "I can't understand you when you're talking in Spanish, Jesse," I tell him.

"How can I resist those eyes?" he whispers before wrapping his arms around me.

I pull the sheets off of myself before getting up on my knees as well, moving my arm to circle around Jesse's neck.

I don't think I've ever known completeness like being here, wrapped in the warmth of him...loving every breath, every sigh, everything about him.

"I love you, Susannah," Jesse whispers and I smile, playing with the hair on the back of his neck.

"You don't know how many times I've dreamed about you saying that to me again," I whisper, leaning in so that our faces are inches apart. "And I love you too."

"Do you love...him?" Jesse asks me and I can trace a hint of jealousy in his voice.

I almost let out a laugh as I shake my head. "No, Jesse...not even a little," I tell him, smiling.

"You do not know how much that relieves me. I have seen you out with him, these past months, and I couldn't help but dread that he would take my place in your heart," Jesse says.

"No one could ever take your place in my heart, Jesse," I tell him, bringing his hand down to my chest. "Because it's all yours."

He blushes for a moment and I realize how close his hand is to my breast, and I know I should be blushing also, but I'm not embarrassed. When he does nothing I move myself a little bit closer to him, causing his hand to slide.

"Susannah...this isn't," he begins but I cut him off. "If the word proper escapes you lips, Jesse, I swear I'll smack you," I say playfully.

He smiles and once again I lean against him, wanting him to do more than he was doing now. I missed him these last 5 months, and I wanted to make up for what we had missed.

"Querida," he whispers, his breath hot against my cheek as he gently pushes my back so that I'm laying down.

Shortly after he's lying down beside me, looking deep into my eyes, and I give him a small kiss.

He slowly wraps his arm around me, pulling me closer to him as he deepens the kiss.

A soft moan escapes my mouth at the feeling and Jesse takes this chance to slip his tongue into my oh so willing mouth.

In a moment, he is hovering over me, now attacking my lips from above as I slide my arms around him.

I have never felt this good in my life, let me tell you. Sure Jesse and I have gotten this far before, but never with this intensity and this much passion.

It's like every pent up emotion and desire from the past five months were pouring out in this single kiss.

Jesse slowly moves his hand from where it rests next to me, and brings it to my waist, where it sits for a moment, his other hand keeping him from squashing me, until it slowly starts to slide up over my nightgown.

I let out a soft moan and kiss him even more intensity. His touch is driving me crazy with desire.

A strangled cry of pleasure escapes my lips as his hand finally touches my breast through the thin fabric, and I have to kiss Jesse even more intensely to keep from waking anyone.

"Sit up, querida," he whispers hoarsely and I nod, doing as he asked.

He leans forward, kissing me just as intensely as before, but this time it was a different type of intense.

This kiss gives me a warm feeling all over. I wrap my arms around him, needing to be as close to him as possible.

Jesse lets out an urgent moan as I do this and I realize why when I feel his hardness pressed against my belly through the nightgown.

I let out a moan as well and slide my hands up under his shirt, his skin firey hot beneath my fingers.

"Querida..." he moans, his breath making my skin tingle in a very good way. His hands find their way to the hem of my long nightgown, slipping his hand underneath and slipping it steadily up until he reaches my thighs.

I raise my arms so that he can slide it up over my head, our fingers entwining in the air once it's gone. I guess I should feel nervous; I'm nearly naked in front of him. But I'm not.

Jesse, on the other hand, is. Nervous, I mean. I can tell by the way his fingers are slightly shaking against mine and how his breath is rapid against my now warm skin.

"Querida, I..." he begins, but I place a finger on his lips, silencing him. "I need you, Jesse," I whisper.

He bites his lip softly, and this makes me smile. I have never seen him this nervous before, and it amuses me how cute he looks.

"What is it?" he asks and I let out a small laugh. "Nothing...just admiring how cute you are," I tell him.

He blushes even more than he's blushing now, and I take this opportunity to kiss him fervently, my hand caressing his cheek.

He slowly wraps his arms around me, pressing our bodies together.

I can feel his heartbeat against my bear chest and it makes me smile, realizing how close we are. I softly nuzzle my nose against his neck and place a few kisses there, "Jesse...touch me," I whisper so softly I thought he didn't hear me at first.

But I realize that he did hear me when I feel his hand slowly massage my breast. "Ohhh, Jesse," I moan, my eyes fluttering close.

"You don't know what you do to me, querida," Jesse whispers in my ear, his free hand moving up to my other breast.

"Mmmm, you better know what you do to me, by now," I say in a moan a little too loud as his thumbs brush over my nipples over and over again and he leans down, kissing me softly.

"You are far too overdressed," I whisper playfully, grinning at him before moving to take his shirt off.

I lean forward kissing his right nipple then his left before leaning up and seizing his lips in a passionate kiss.

"You are so beautiful, Querida," he says in my ear as his hands move up and down over my back, his mouth then leaving a trail of kisses across my jaw.

I have to stop myself from crying out in pleasure as he begins to massage my breasts again. His touches feel so, sooo good.

I can't keep my hands still, so I reach out and pull him closer to me, my nails digging into his back, but instead of him wincing in pain, he hisses in pleasure.

His hands slide down to my panties and he looks deep into my eyes, silently asking if I'm ready, if this is what I want.

I look into his eyes for a few moments, my mouth opening and closing over and over again as I think of something to say, but when nothing really fits, I simply nod, placing my hands on top of his.

He kisses me softly as he slides my panties down my legs. This is when I start to get a little nervous.

What I'm about to do...what we're about to do, it big. I can't take it back once it's done.

But as I look into his eyes, I know that there is no one else I'd rather do it with. I lean forward and kiss him with all of the passion I can muster.

Once again, I feel him shaking slightly against my completely bare skin and I look up at him.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Jesse?" I ask, making sure he doesn't have any second thoughts.

"Of course, Querida. There is nothing else in the world I want more than to make love with you...I just, well..." He says, blushing profusely.

"I'm nervous too, Jesse," I tell him, placing my hand on his cheek.

"It's not that...I just...I don't want to hurt you, I want to make this moment amazing for you," Jesse says softly.

My heart swells with love for him and I feel tears gather in my eyes. "Anything with you is amazing, Jesse," I whisper.

"I...I am inexperienced in the ways of, of pleasure," he says in a whisper and I take a deep breath. "I know...I don't care. I want to be with you Jesse, you," I tell him.

He smiles down at him and kisses me softly before removing his pants. "I love you so much, Susannah," he says softly.

"I love you more than I could have ever thought possible, Jesse," I reply, and I am not able to resist looking down at him.

...And I like what I see. No, I LOVE what I see. I smile a little and look up at him, blushing slightly.

Jesse is blushing much more profusely, though, probably thinking the worst at the moment.

I cannot find words so I simply kiss him intensely before lying back down and pulling him down with me.

Jesse reaches down to his erection and leads it to my center and I stop breathing for a moment when I feel it prod against my entrance.

"No turning back, querida," he says and I nod in understanding as he takes us both past the point of no return.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: We own nothing from Mediator, nothing at all

Author's Note: Let me start by saying how soooo sorry we are that this has been delayed, life has been really busy, but we hope to start posting at least one chapter a week from now on, until the story is finished. Thank you to all of you who didn't give up on this story, you guys are great. We really hope you like this chapter 

**Chapter 5**

I lie in my bed, alone, the next morning, my nightgown back on and my bed neatly made again. I would have thought the whole thing was a dream if not for the soreness in between my legs.

I won't lie. It did hurt. Jesse was so hesitant to continue after he saw the tears in my eyes but I had urged him forward. Other than that, it was one of the most amazing nights of my life, if not THE most amazing.

A small smile comes to my lips as I look over at the servant's door that he went through not 2 hours ago, after promising me that he would come back.

I told my mother to cancel lessons for today, that I wasn't feeling well, which was true to an extent. Part of me just wanted to see Jesse again.

A tentative knocking at my door captures my attention once again and I cover myself before telling them to enter.

"Oh, hello, David," I say, smiling and sitting up. "Please, come in and sit."

"I'm sorry to come in here like this Suze...I just, I heard something last night and..." he says, furrowing his eyebrows and sitting down on a chair.

I start to panic a little but shake it off. "Uhm...like what?" I ask.

"It was a sort of...bumping," he says, frowning and I pale a little bit. David's room is below mine, and the floors aren't very thick.

"Oh well, you might have just been dreaming," I reply, giving him a small smile.

"I don't know, it went on for a while, Suze, loud bumping, I thought it was an earthquake," David says.

I try to repress a giggle as I say, "Well, I didn't hear anything," though I let a smile slip through. God, I didn't know Jesse and I were that loud.

"Are you sure it was from up here, not next to you?" I ask, pulling my coverlet up to my chin.

David shook his head. "No, I'm pretty sure it was from up here...did you hear it?" he replies.

"Nope...I'm pretty sure that I didn't, but I sleep like there's no tomorrow, so I might have...slept through it," I say slowly.

"If you don't mind, David, I'm kind of tired," I say, yawning as he stands.

"Of course, Suze. I hope you feel better," he says before leaving.

"Thank you," I say, smiling over at him before snuggling down further in my warm covers. We've been having a chilly spell lately, even though it's mid may.

After a little while, Jesse appears in my room, a huge grin on his face. I grin also as he approaches my bed.

"Good morning," I whisper, leaning in and kissing him softly, my fingers stroking his cheek.

"Morning," he replies, sitting on the edge of the bed, placing his hand over mine.

"Jesse...David heard us last night," I whisper, grinning as I tell him this and his eyes widen in fear for a second and then they turn to confusion.

"...Were we really that loud?" he asks and I laugh a little.

"I guess so...well at least you were, I told you not to use the bed as...as leverage," I say, my eyes twinkling in amusement as he blushes profusely.

"Susannah," he says sharply and I grin.

"Sorry, Jesse," I say, laughing and kissing him softly.

"You know I love to joke around with you, I love seeing you blush, you just look too cute," I tell him before getting up and locking the door.

I sit down next to him on the bed as he turns to face me. I lean forward and kiss him softly, though the kiss soon becomes more passionate.

Jesse's large hands start to massage my breasts over my nightgown and I let out a soft moan, wrapping my arm around his torso to pull him closer to me when I hear a gasp...one that isn't very masculine.

We break apart from each other almost instantly and see a very shocked Renee standing in the room. Oh shit.

I jump up from my bed, wiping my mouth dry as I quickly think of something to say...anything so that she will not rush off and tell my mother.

She starts rambling in French, but I hastily stop her. "Please, Renee, don't tell," I beg, hurrying over to her.

"Renee...I'm begging you," I say, clasping my hands before running off to my wardrobe and pulling out a drawer, taking out one of my silver pendants on a long silver chain, "Please...I will give you this to keep if you don't tell my mother...she would kill him."

Before she can say anything, I take her hand and press the pendant into it. "Renee, please," I whisper, tears now gathered in my eyes. If she told my mother, my life would be over. I would have no purpose for living.

"...D'accord..." she says and I let out a long sigh of relief before pressing the edge of my sleeve to my eyes to gather the tears.

"Thank you, Renee," I say shakily, smiling. "You'll never know how much this means to me."

She gives me a small smile in return and then gasps as I pull her into a tight hug. I know she's not accustomed to having such a crazy mistress, but I'm just so overwhelmed.

Slowly, hesitantly, she returns the hug and after a moment we pull apart. "I'll leave you two alone now, your Highness," she says, smiling before turning to leave.

I let out another sigh before slowly turning around, my hair falling in front of my face as I reach down into my nightgown and pull out the long silver chain that rested in-between my breasts.

"That was close, querida," Jesse says as I slowly walk over to the bed, playing with the pendant that Jesse gave to me for my birthday. That seems like years ago.

"Yeah, it was. Maybe we shouldn't...you know, in the daylight," I tell him, sitting down on the edge.

"Yes, I think that would be best," he says, pulling me into an embrace and kissing my forehead softly.

"You should go," I say to him as we sit there, sunlight pouring into my room as it gets higher in the sky.

He kisses my forehead again and nods his head. "I love you," he whispers as he stands up.

"Love you too," I say in reply, yawning a little before getting back in my bed.

He looks down at me and smiles, reaching for my hand and giving it a squeeze. "I'll come back tonight," he tells me and I nod, pulling the covers up over me and closing my eyes.

I don't wake up until probably around noon, and by then my room is stifling hot, even for May. I groan and get up, cracking my 4 window open just as my mother enters the room.

"How are you feeling, Susannah?" she asks as I crawl back into bed.

"All right, I suppose," I reply.

"I'm going to have the chef make you up some nice warm soup, and Renee will bring it in for you. It's too bad you were sick, it's such a nice day out, we were planning on letting you take a stroll around the gardens," Mother says, but I squint my eyes in suspicion, she would never just let me do what I wanted by myself.

"What? Is that so hard to believe?" she asks, raising her eyebrows at me. I sigh and shake my head.

"No, mother," I mumble, sliding even further under the covers.

"Okay. Oh, I invited Paul to supper this Saturday, please make sure you get plenty of rest...we wouldn't want you sick for it," she says, patting my arm before getting up and leaving.

Ugh. Dinner with Paul again. Nearly once a week for the past five months, she's had him over for dinner or lunch or something so that I'll warm up to him, but I won't. He's highly inappropriate, resting his hand on my knee or putting his arm around me. It makes me sick even thinking about it.

Last lunch he had gone so far as to try and kiss me again as we were horseback riding afterwards.

He is such a jerk, total opposite of Jesse. He thinks that women are here solely for the pleasure of men and treats me like dirt whereas Jesse respects women and practically worships the ground on which I walk.

Let me tell you, I would have almost like to go to lessons today. Lying in bed for the entire day when it is so beautiful outside is never fun.

Deciding I need to get outside, I stand up and get changed into a simple dress. Hopefully I'll see Jesse out there.

I slowly walk out of my chambers, glancing up and down the hall to make sure no one is coming, and then I dash for the servant's stairs.

When I enter the gardens, I feel more at ease than I have in a while. Well, besides when I'm with Jesse.

I smile and look up at the crystal clear sky before walking briskly for the palace gardens, where no one will be able to see me from the palace.

"Ah, Suze, what a surprise." Oh god. What is he doing here??

"Paul," I say, nodding to him as I turn around.

"I thought you were sick? Are you faking? Now, now Suze, that's not a very princess-like thing to do," Paul says.

"I just need some fresh air," I reply before starting to walk away.

"Suze...please, can't we walk like two entirely civilized people?" Paul asks me.

"I only see one here," I reply, glaring at him.

He sighs, shaking his head and reaches out to me, wrapping his muscular arm around my shoulder.

"Don't touch me!" I exclaim, shoving him away and glaring,

"Suze, Suze, Suze," he says, shaking his head, "When are you going to learn? We could do this the easy way, or we could do this the hard way."

"I was never one for taking the easy way out," I say angrily.

"Fine, the hard way it is," Paul says, reaching out and grabbing my hand, pulling me over to him and kissing me in one swift movement.

My eyes shot wide open and I started to push him away, but his arms slid around my waist, not letting me go.

I start to panic and my body becomes stiff as my brain tries to fervently think of something to do...anything to get him off of me.

Something in my mind clicked and I smirked, bringing my knee up and hitting...well...you know.

"Fuck," Paul cries, bringing his hands down to shield his manhood as I quickly run off.

I hurry right up to my room, locking it so that even if anyone found out, they couldn't come in. I turn around quickly and nearly fall over, seeing Jesse standing at the far end of the room.

"Oh my God! Jesse you nearly scared me to death! What are you doing here in the middle of the day?" I ask him, walking up to give him a kiss.

He gently pushes me away and says softly, "I saw you...with him."

"With...him?" I ask, confused for a moment until I remember that I had just been running away from Paul.

"Oh, Jesse," I say as comprehension dawns on me. I look up into his eyes but instantly look away. Those big brown eyes that were once filled with love were now filled with hurt and confusion.

"Jesse...what did you see?" I ask him, reaching out to grab his arm gently.

"I saw you...kissing him," he says slowly, as if it hurt to say those words.

"I didn't kiss him! He kissed me! And then I kicked him!" I exclaim, frowning as I try to turn him back towards me.

The hurt in his eyes turns to anger and he balls his hands into fists. "He kissed you? That bastardo, if he so much as LOOKS at you again I'll..." he trails off and starts rambling in Spanish.

"Jesse...Jesse, calm down," I say, running my hand up and down his arm gently, "I won't let this happen again, okay? I'm sorry that it hurt you...I don't like seeing you look at me like that."

"Querida, I'm sorry I overreacted...I should have known you would never kiss him willingly," he says, placing his hand on my cheek.

"It's fine. I should get back to bed now," I tell him softly, a tear leaking out of the corner of my eye as I turn around.

A few more fall and I start to wipe them away when I feel Jesse's hand on my shoulder. "Susannah, why are you crying?" he asks.

"You really need to go Jesse," I say, shrugging his hand off and walking towards my bed.

"Querida," he says softly, turning me around so that I'm facing him.

"Jesse...just go," I say, looking away from him.

He lets out a soft sigh and kisses my cheek, "As you wish," he says before turning to leave.

I wipe at the tears left on my face, looking over my shoulder to make sure Jesse is gone, before slipping back in bed, and not waking up until the next morning.

A few days pass and Jesse hasn't come to see me. Figures...things just get good between us and then I go and blow it. What makes matters worse is Paul is still trying to kiss me, hold my hand, anything and tonight's the big dinner with him.

My mother makes a big fuss about taking me out to town to get a new dress made, which means hours of standing still while the tailor fits me and pokes me with their pins.

As I enter the dining room, Paul rises from his chair, a smug smile on his face. He's probably going to try and pull something tonight.

Andy and my mother lead the way, with myself and all of my stepbrothers behind me as we make our way for the table.

"You look gorgeous tonight, Suze," Paul whispers in my ear as I sit down and he pushes my chair in for me.

I ignore him, sticking my nose high in the air and turning on my snobbishness full force. I have to admit though, his words melted my harsh exterior a bit.

The rest of the dinner goes well, Paul even made me laugh a few times. At the end of dinner, however, he invited me to join him out in the garden.

One look at my mother and I know that if I refuse, I will be barricaded in my room for the rest of the week, so I agree and he leads me out there.

"I must apologize for my forwardness the other day," he says and I think I hear him wrong. Is he really apologizing to me???

"Are you seriously apologizing to me, Paul?" I ask, resting my hands in front of myself as we walk around the dimly lit garden.

"Yeah, Suze...my behavior was totally out of line," he says, moving a little closer to me.

"Yes, it was," I agree, nodding and walking a little bit farther away from him.

"I think we should try and...start over," he says, still moving closer.

"That would be nice," I say, stepping back every time he took another step closer to me.

Unfortunately, I back up into a rose bush, thorns sticking into me here and there. Paul gently helps me out and when I'm standing, places his hands on my waist.

"You don't have to be afraid of me, Suze," he says, a hand coming up and brushing a piece of my hair aside.

"What...what makes you think I'm afraid of you?" I ask softly, my heart racing as he lets his hand rest on my cheek.

"For one, you're heart is beating about 1000 times per second, and for two...you keep backing away from me," Paul says.

"I'm not a bad guy, Suze," he says, his other hand resting on my other cheek. "Let me in,"

I frown, looking down towards the ground as he moves in closer until our bodies are pretty much touching all over.

My eyes wander back up to his face and before I know it, he's kissing me again. And this time...I don't fight back.

A low moan escapes my mouth as he holds my chin gently in his fingertips, leaning it up so that he can kiss me from that different angle, his other hand wrapping around the back of my neck.

I slide my arms around him, deepening the kiss even further, after several moments, we part, both breathing heavily.

"Wow," he whispers, his tongue darting out to lick his lips softly before it disappeared back into his mouth.

A small grin appears on my face. Wow is right. He is a great kisser. Not better than Jesse but...different.

Paul leans in again, brushing his nose against my neck and kissing me softly there before heading back up to my lips.

"Susannah? Paul? Where are you?" I hear my mother call and we break apart, not before getting in a few more moments of tongue-action.

I quickly pull away, wiping at my mouth before picking up my skirts and walking to where my mother's voice came from, "Right here, Mother, we were just talking over by the rose bushes," I say, smiling at her.

She smiles and nods her head. "Well, it's getting late, I trust you'll be in soon," she says before leaving.

"That means I have about 5 minutes to get upstairs before she sends out one of my brothers to watch over us," I tell Paul.

He grins and takes my hand, pulling me closer to him. "Well then, we should make the best of it," he says before capturing my lips in a mind-blowing kiss.

Half an hour later I am in my bedroom, Marie helping me undress and put on my nightgown.

When she's done, I go over to the window and open it, looking down at the garden where Paul and I were kissing not an hour before.

A little smile graces my lips as I prop the window open, letting in some of the chilly night air to cool off my warm room, and skin.

My lips were still tingling from when I kissed Paul. It felt...dangerous, that's why I liked it so much. It was so different from the safeness I felt around Jesse. It was like living on the edge.

I swiftly pull my hair over my shoulder, putting it in a quick braid before literally diving into the softness of my bed, snuggling up under the covers and letting nature's sounds drift me off to sleep.

I awake the next morning, freezing as if it were January, not May. I open my eyes and realize why: the window was open.

Something clicks in my head and I quickly stand up, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes and walking to the window, my eyes widening as I see the two words sketched onto its foggy pane. I saw.

_I saw_. Two simple words, but as I see them my world comes crashing down and I burst into tears.

I reach down into my nightgown, pulling out the small pendant and holding it in-between my finger tips, even more tears escaping my eyes.

"Your Highness?" I faintly hear Renee's voice and look up, not able to stop crying. "Your Highness, what's wrong?"

"He...he doesn't love me anymore," I say brokenly, burying my face in my hands and letting out sob after sob.

"Who? Jesse?" she asks and I nod silently, not able to control my tears.

"He saw, he...he saw Paul and I kissing...and now he doesn't love me anymore," I whisper.

She kneels beside me and rests her hand on my shoulder. "It'll be all right, your highness," she says softly.

"No it won't. My life is over," I say, frowning and closing my eyes as a few more tears slip out.

"Would you like me to talk to him for you?" she asks.

"No...God no, that would be mortifying," I say softly, shaking my head.

"Ok then, if you're sure," she says, nodding.

I nod in return and tell her, "Yes, I'm sure."

"Go back to sleep, I'll shut your window for you, it is still early yet," Renee says, smiling at me.

"Thank you, Renee," I reply, wiping my tears away before slowly walking back to my bed.

I stare dismally at the servant's entrance at the far side of my room before closing my eyes, not noticing as Jesse sticks his head in, only to be glared away by Renee a moment later.


	6. Chapter 6

Two Months Later

"Good afternoon, your highness," Paul says, bowing deeply before scooping me up in his arms and twirling me around.

"Good afternoon, good sir," I reply as he leans in and kisses me breathless.

He gently sets me down and takes my hand. "Where are we off to today, Miss?" he asks. Since I started becoming closer with Paul, my mother let me outside of the palace grounds with him.

He gently sets me down and takes my hand. "Where are we off to today, Miss?" he asks. Since I started becoming closer with Paul, my mother let me outside of the palace grounds with him.

"I don't know...someplace exciting," I say, smiling as we walk over to Paul's carriage and he helps me in.

As we head off to wherever we're going, my mind wanders to Jesse. I haven't seen or spoken to him in two months...not that I expect him to want anything to do with me after what happened.

But it still makes me sad sometimes. What we had was so wonderful...and in the blink of the eye it was over.

I still wear the necklace he gave me all the time. I cannot help it, I'm still in love with him.

I never thought it would hurt so much to not be with him...if I knew back when I kissed Paul, I would have never done it.

"Something wrong, Suze?" Paul asks, putting his arm around me and pulling me closer to him.

"No, nothing's wrong Paul...I guess I'm just a little tired," I tell him softly, smiling up at him.

"Would you like to go back and rest?" he asks and I let out a soft sigh. "No, Paul, I'm fine," I reply.

"If you wouldn't mind? I don't know why I'm so tired," I say, closing me eyes for a moment.

"Of course," he says before telling the driver to take us back to the castle.

"I'm sorry I had to cut out day short, Paul," I say, frowning a little bit as he helps me down from the carriage and inside the Palace.

"It's no trouble at all, Suze," he replies, giving me a reassuring smile.

"I will see you Saturday at Supper, then?" I ask him and he nods before leaning in and kissing me softly.

We exchange our goodbyes before I hurry upstairs to my room, nearly falling on to the bed once I'm there.

I feel awful. I haven't lied to Paul in such a long time, and now here I am lying to him about being tired when I'm not tired in the least.

"Suze," I hear Renee say as she enters the room. "I wasn't expecting you back for a couple hours." Renee and I have become good friends since what happened with Jesse.

"I...sort of lied to Paul, told him that I was tired," I say and she helps me out of my day dress and into something a little more casual and comfortable.

"And I take it that you're not," she says and I smile a little, shaking my head.

"Have you...seen Jesse lately?" I ask.

"I see him everyday," Renee says and I nod, of course she does, they're both slaves, they live in the same quarters.

"Is he...how is he doing?" I ask, pulling out the pendant he gave me and gazing at it with sad eyes.

"I would be lying if I said he was doing fine," she tells me.

"Why? What's wrong?" I ask, frowning.

"What do you think?" Renee asks me, raising her brow.

I let out a sigh and close my eyes. "I feel horrible for what I did to him, Renee," I say softly.

"And you still wouldn't like me to talk to him?" she asks me.

I shake my head furiously. She asks me this almost every day and every day, I want to say yes. I miss Jesse so much.

Pursing her lips softly Renee shakes her head softly and makes to leave as I sit down on my chaise lounge, pulling out a book.

After about an hour I close my book and stand up, nearly fainting when I see Jesse. "What...what are you doing here?" I ask shakily.

He opens and closes his mouth silently before mumbling something in Spanish, "I...I shouldn't have come here," he finally says.

"No, wait!" I exclaim as he turns to leave. "Please, stay."

"I...it's not proper. You're alone, and I just...no," Jesse says, shaking his head.

He opens the servant's door and is about to leave when I whisper, "I miss you."

He turns his head slightly to look at me, "You have him now," he says bitterly.

A few tears fall from my eyes as I walk over to him. "But my heart belongs to another, it always has," I tell him.

"It could never work Susannah..." Jesse says softly to me.

"I don't care," I reply, reaching for his hand.

"So many things could go wrong...I mean, you're betrothed now Susannah," Jesse says, a look of despair on his face.

"I don't care," I repeat, taking his hand in mine. "I want you, Jesse...I need you."

"I...I just, I'm too tired to talk to you right now, Susannah," he says exasperatedly, pulling his hand away.

"Please, don't leave," I cry, reaching for his hand once more.

"Susannah...I can't go through this again. I can't," Jesse says brokenly, turning around to face me.

My heart shatters at the look he gives me, so full of hurt. "I'm sorry, Jesse," I whisper, blinking as a few tears fall from my eyes.

"Sorry can't fix everything, Suze," he says to me.

"S...Suze?" I say softly. He's never ever called me Suze before. Jesse doesn't say anything to me and this makes my heart break even more.

"Goodbye, Suze," he says softly before turning to leave. This is it. The last time I'll ever see him.

"So that's it? You...you're just going to give up, just like that?" I ask him, my voice loud in the quiet air of the morning. He stops moving and I see his shoulders tense up at my words.

I move forward and place my hand on his shoulder which only makes him tense up even more.

"Are you?" I ask him again softly.

He is silent for a moment before turning around. He doesn't say anything, just looks into my eyes.

"You haven't answered me yet," I say almost silently.

He sighs and rests his hand on my cheek, stroking it softly. "The things you do to me, querida," he mumbles before kissing me softly.

I smile, my heart feeling like it's exploding with happiness, which doesn't really sound like the greatest thing, but it feels WONDERFUL.

"Jesse, I am so, so sorry and I love you so much," I whisper, sliding my arms around his neck and gazing up into his eyes.

"Are you telling the truth this time?" he asks me, his eyes no longer full of hurt.

"With all of my heart," I tell him, smiling and kissing him passionately, pouring all of my pent up love and emotion into this kiss.

He doesn't say another word as he scoops me up into his arm as if I don't weigh anything at all, depositing me onto my bed and yanking off his shirt in less than 10 seconds.

I let out a soft moan and start to kiss his neck as he unlaces my dress. I gasp softly as cool air hits my body once my dress is gone and gaze up at Jesse through my lashes.

"I've missed your touch," I whisper as he trails his hand up and down my back, tracing circles all along my spine.

"Not as much as I've missed touching you," Jesse whispers huskily, his breath sending shivers down my spine as a tingling sensation forms in between my legs.

"Oh Jesse," I breathe, sinking my nails into his shoulders as he leaves a trail of kisses all along my neck.

"Your skin smells so wonderful, Querida," he mumbles, sucking on a particularly sensitive spot near my collarbone. He gently pushes me back so that I'm lying down and kisses me from above.

Wrapping my leg around his torso elicits a deep, throaty moan from him and I use this as an excuse to slip my tongue into his mouth, and he was only too willing to have it there.

"Oh querida," he moans, kissing me ever deeper and massaging my breast with his hand.

I let out a low moan as I feel his lips against my breast, sucking at it lightly while I writhe underneath him, moan after moan escaping my lips.

I slide my arms around his neck and grind up against him, causing him to moan my name. It sounds so beautiful coming from his mouth.

"Jesse...stop...stop for a second," I moan out as his hands starts to slip into my panties, "I...I want to do something for...for you."

His breathing becomes more rapid and he manages to say, "Go...go right ahead."

I gently push him back against my sheets and kiss him avidly, my hand snaking down his toned stomach in the meanwhile until it reaches his trousers. He moans into my mouth as I slowly slide them down his legs.

"You don't have to if it you don't want to..." Jesse says quickly as I kiss my way down his chest.

I look up at him and smile. "There's nothing in the world I'd rather do," I tell him, placing one last kiss on his chest before lowering my mouth onto him, smirking as he lets out a low moan, fisting a hand in my hair which encourages me to continue.

I move around on the bed so that I'm smack dab in the middle of his incredibly toned and sexy legs, gazing up at him with passion burning in my eyes.

His head is thrown back in ecstasy, his eyes closed and his mouth hanging open as he moans in ecstasy at what I'm doing…what I'M doing.

"Mmm...Querida...oh God right there like that...Mmm yeah..." Jesse says, starting to ramble and his breaths start becoming more labored, beads of sweat forming on his perfect forehead.

As his dick hits the back of my throat, he lets out a strangled cry which turns me on even more than I already am.

I make sure to switch my technique every now and again, letting him thrust into my mouth as much as he wants; I just want him to have as much pleasure as he wants.

"Dios querida," he moans before letting out a cry of pleasure (thank god this wing of the castle is empty during the day) as he comes into my mouth.

My first reflex is to spit out the bitter stuff, but I decide to swallow it as best I can, and it seems to please Jesse seeing how he let out a few more moans before collapsing against the bed.

He sits up and grins at me, pulling me in for a kiss. "Thank you, Susannah," he says and I giggle a little.

"You don't have to thank me. I enjoy watching you, you look so adorable when you orgasm," I tell him, smirking.

He grins even more and in a split second, I'm beneath him and he's touching me anywhere and everywhere while his lips caress my own.

A light mewl escapes my throat as he sucks on my breast as his hand trails down my stomach to my panties, slowly petting me over the thin fabric.

"Do you like that, querida?" he whispers in my ear. Before I can even answer, he removes my panties and slides two fingers into me, causing me to cry out in pleasure.

I take deep, panting breaths as he fingers me slowly, watching me with hooded eyes as I pant out his name over and over again.

I finally cry out his name as I come all over his fingers. Breathless, I look up at him as he slowly licks my cum off of his fingers, driving me nearly mad with desire.

My mouth turns into a grin as my gaze sweeps down his body to his manhood, which is already fully erect again, and I sit up a little straighter.

He grins right back at me, pulling me into a soul-searing kiss. I softly moan into his mouth as I wrap my arms around him, pulling him closer and pressing our naked bodies together.

"Make love to me, Jesse," I breathe out as I kiss him over and over again, my tongue making love to his mouth.

"As you wish, mi querida," he whispers, taking his erection in his hands and guiding it to my opening.

"Take it...take it slow this time. I haven't had you in me in so long Jesse, I want to be able to remember what it feels like," I whisper back to him.

"Whatever you want," he says softly, kissing me passionately before loving every inch of me.


End file.
